Part 65 Turbulence


I return to work the next morning to work a half day. I come home for lunch, and notice that today as in the past days I am becoming more forgetful. I open refrigerator doors and cabinets to my left and move to the right, forgetting to close them. I turn on a sink faucet, do something else, and realize I have not turned the faucet off. I am not attending to objects in my left peripheral field of vision. These are becoming frequent events, and are marginally disturbing to me. What is less than marginally disturbing is walking into the bathroom and suddenly feeling my head spinning, the lights dimming, and finding myself on the floor.

I have never fainted before, so this feeling is new to me. I could feel myself slipping out of consciousness, and caught myself as soon as I hit the floor. I even tried to quickly jump up to pretend it didn’t happen. But Becah heard me and I think even caught me out of the corner of her eye. She runs to me, breathlessly exclaiming, “what happened! What happened!” I can’t explain, but simply shake my head, mumbling “I don’t know”.

Later in the afternoon I go for my OT and PT sessions. My blood pressure is taken and is an acceptable 107 over 65. I have no more strange events the rest of the day. However, the next day, after the kids head to Nederland with grandparents, I begin experiencing some chills and sweating after my meals. I am also having pain in the area of my feeding tube. These new developments are unsettling. I draw up a list of concerns and questions to discuss with the three physicians I am scheduled to meet with in the next week.



Part 66 The list

1. Radiation ended in late March. Are these lingering side effects that I am experiencing, that will eventually dissipate?
2. Is it safe to use anesthesia to dilate my esophagus now? Would it be safer to wait?
3. Are my physical afflictions the result of anesthesia only, or a combined effect of anesthesia and radiation?
4. Will my esophagus widen eventually on its own without these multiple (and potentially dangerous) surgical procedures?
5. Why do I feel more sick (nausea, chills, sweating) following tube feedings now when I didn’t before?
6. Why am I always so tired?
7. Do I weigh enough (at 150 pounds) for my body to withstand any more treatments or procedures? Or will I be crushed and blow away?