Part 40 Honeysuckle idyll


In the evening Dr. Se- returns, prescribing me some “swish and spit” to numb my mouth (when everything else fails, just numb the whole thing!). He wants to set up a PET scan next week (which will be six weeks following the last radiation treatment). I am to get Anna (the head nurse at the chemo center) to prepare my chart so Drs. Se- and Bu- can review the results. If the scan is clean, the chemo ends.

Becah returns soon after. I read a Sierra Club article about the San Gabriel mountains outside of Los Angeles, and some more passages from Thich Nhat Hanh’s book “Breathe”, trying to practice rather than just read about its importance. Elvy, a nurse who is also from India, has been really calming, and even though she must leave at 7:00, she disconnects my IV. Free at last! I continue to read “When We Get to Surf City”. All said, despite the freedom from the IV this has been physically my worse day at the hospital regarding the mucous – my lips are now bloody! I sleep at night from 10:00 until about 1:30, awaking when a beeping noise from one of the machines goes off. After I get over that, I sleep again until 2:45 when I start choking on phlegm. I manage to sleep from 3:00 until 6:00 when the staff disturbs me to take some blood.

Friday morning is check out morning. I have been here one week, although it seems much longer. I return to my home, with lush green grass that will soon be manicured by the lawn men, and it is already beautiful. The scent of honeysuckle fills the air. I sit outside and go through the mail and instantly reconnect with the world (although some of the bills make me question my desire to be back!). I pick up Brooke from daycare and she is so happy. I get a big hug from Bree a few minutes later when she gets out of school. She lost a tooth last night, so her bright smile has a hole in it. Becah later takes the kids to a friend’s house, and I am free to do yoga while listening to Sam and Dave. I realize I have just invented “soul yoga”. The ensuing weekend days are cool in the mornings and warm in the afternoons. I play with Brooke on the backyard swing and walk her to Bree’s school (a.k.a. our park). I drive one evening to get gas in the car and to take the kids for a sandwich, my first time behind the wheel in a while. Another time I go on a long bicycle ride with the family through the neighborhood, with Brooke on a special seat to ride with us. We watch the Astros on TV, then play some whiffle ball in the front yard. Bree and I watch a part of the Narnia movie, “Prince Caspian”. All of these are special moments that I vow not to take for granted again.

All is not idyllic, though. I still struggle with serious mucous disturbance. I buy some jumbo-sized multivitamins to jump start my health, only to find that I can’t swallow them. Becah has cut a red ripe tomato and laced it with basil (both fresh from our new garden), but I can’t enjoy the dinner, and I am bummed at that.