Part 149 Standing (but mostly lying) on shaky ground


I wobble up the next day with brief nausea and excessive mucous after awaking twice at night to change leaky bandages. I weigh in at a disturbing 145.9 pounds. I manage to get in two and one-half hours at work before driving to the medical center to see Bl-. Brooke entertains her there (addressing Bl- as “hey baby” on one occasion). We traveled afterward to CC's house, where I rested while the others attended a party at Houston Baptist University. Back at home later I attempted eating a little cheddar soup, fighting off nausea until I went to bed.

The next day looks much the same. I try a little eggs, applesauce, and chocolate milk for breakfast before putting in a few hours at work. A speech therapy appointment follows, but I must leave early due to my feeling nauseous from excessive mucous. I lay and rest at home, taking more Phenergen in an unsuccessful effort to relieve the queasiness. The yoghurt I attempt to eat doesn’t work too well, and by six o’clock I am heaving. This condition has abated little by nine at night. Becah is upset, worrying that this far after my release from the hospital I am still in such shape.

I sleep well through the night but awake still feeling sick. I take more Phenergen, reluctantly so since it isn’t working well and just makes me sleepy to boot. GG goes to the pharmacy to retrieve a new med she had a physician call in the night before. By shortly after noon I am in the grasp of a major volley of heaves. I desperately attempt to climb out of bed to check some work emails, but still get no relief. In the midst of this, I remember it is my youngest daughter’s first day back to preschool, and I wonder how she is faring. Becah is doing a presentation at work. Everyone is off doing something useful, except me. I linger here feeling worse each minute. My weight has actually dropped to a new out-of-hospital low of 143.8 pounds. Just when I ask, “what next?”, the phone rings and my mother informs me her physicians think she has a malignancy in one lung.

Becah arrives at home later, confronting me about being more actively involved with my kids. I feel like life is kicking me around.

One bright spot, though. My blood pressure is a strong 121/85, and my voice is clear.